Hi Kamikaze,
I've got an HP which I recently updated the RAM on. I had exactly the same headache as you.
The HP site didn't list my model. Crucial told me I needed a particular speed of RAM (which I bought only to find it wasn't compatible). Don't trust the Crucial scanner....it doesn't give correct results.
In the end, the guys on the HP support site game me the best advice.
HP models can be particularly picky with RAM types. Make sure you use the same type as is installed (DDR2, DDR3 etc..) and the same speed. G-Skill is a brand of RAM which works with HP. I bought it and it worked on mine, and many people on the HP site said it worked with their laptops.
If in doubt, as an Expert on the HP site.
BTW: I'm running 6GB or RAM (one 2GB+4GB) of different brands, and I don't seem to have any problems.
Having said that, I am going to get a matching stick very soon, to bump mine up to 8GB.