Thank you all for the great tips and advice. Sadly nothing is panning out. So here's the kicker...
I downloaded a 60 day trial version of Reaper. I wanted to see if a different DAW would make a difference. Reaper recognized my Apollo in seconds, configured using only defaults (256 latency) allowed me to import all my Sonar wave files and then let me add plugins (UAD, WAVES, and SONAR) to the mixes in real time while the songs were playing with no glitches, no dropouts, no crashes...perfect mixing experience.
I tried to stress test the system and worked on a song with 35 tracks and 9 sub mixes and each track had at least one plug in that I added in real time while the song was playing. When I reached 75 plugins with no issues (adding them as well as making edits to the eq, reverb, delay, etc) I stopped...I was convinced.
Reaper is working for me with a reasonable look and feel, can do all the basic functions I could do in SONAR and I can focus on my mixes and plugins with no issues.
I hate to say it, team, but for me, personally, Reaper is kicking Sonar's hind quarters and the issue on my system with my setup is Sonar. Reaper just proved that to me. I am not pitching Reaper to anyone, just saying I haven't had this kind of stability in a long time. I just wish it could have happened with Sonar and not a 60.00 software package.