whack
I love those accidental flat keys giving that persian vibe.
 
This is cinematic for sure and ideal for that purpose. The beat didnt seem out of sync to me up front. The sitar was a good choice.
 
If used for cinema soundscape its probably fine, for listening pleasure solo it needs a climax at some stage and just a tad too long overall.
 
Good work could sell this for something.
 
Cian

Thanks Cian!  You're right - this is not really a pop piece.  It's meant to be ambient electronica, although it's currently a bit short for that genre.  I come from a background doing a lot of rock, punk and pop production, so I guess I couldn't quite let go completely and let the sounds flow.  This is the direction I am thinking of taking this song.  It will probably mean significantly increasing the song's length, taking it firmly out of the realm of pop music, adding a couple of new instrument voices doing solo explorations, and adding a "B" rhythm/break part.
 
As for selling it... my only serious aspiration right now is to create something that would be worthy of getting a spin or two on a big internet radio station like Soma FM's Groove Salad. I wouldn't know where to begin if I wanted to try to sell it.  Do you have any pointers?  Who would buy such a thing?
 
By the way, I listened to a few of your songs and was quite impressed.  You're a great pop producer, as well as writer, singer and instrumentalist.  And, congratulations on your recent tour! :)

I just listened on my Mackie Monitors...very nice...I had listened before in headphones how I usually work but every once in a while I can preview through speakers...this track was a treat! - Shawn

Thanks Shawn.  Glad you enjoyed it!

Well done - you should get a job writing movie soundtracks if you don't already 

That is really cool. I try doing something like that and it gets too dense and muddy with too much gunk layered on.
 
I like the way that different little things pop in and out spicing it up as the main groove plows on.
 
And Sitar is a buzzy sounding instrument anyway, so that is probably what someone else mentioned earlier.

Thanks for listening and for your comments Charlie and Byron!

Interesting piece. I hear it as background to some thriller where the killer is doing all these preparations for his nefarious misdeeds.
 
Well done!  

Hehe, I hadn't thought about it that way Guitarpima.  Thanks for listening, and offering your creative comments!

I have no idea why a word  having to do with things like salt and pepper and ending in "ing" got edited the way it did.

loving the sitar flavor pluggin right from get go. very dark and foreboding. ominously engaging. well well done :) - Daren