• Songs
  • Original Country Ballad - "I Pretended She was You" (p.2)
2013/08/04 21:26:05
doncolga
Great title.  Fabulous rationalization...so does she buy it?
I'd pull back the vocal a pretty good bit and remove the doubles also.  Really nice steel playing there.
2013/08/05 10:41:20
Eddie TX
MannyNY
1)      Lyrically, I don’t think there’s a person on earth dumb enough to hear those words “I pretended she was you” and even consider doing anything other than knocking you out.
 


doncolga
Great title.  Fabulous rationalization...so does she buy it?
 

 
Thanks for the comments, guys.  As for the lyrics, the guy is struggling to rationalize his wrongdoing, but I'm not making it clear whether he's actually telling his wife, or just imagining doing so.  Interpret it as you wish. 
 
Cheers,
Eddie
 
 
2013/08/05 19:22:43
dcumpian
The snare stick needs to be louder. Love the space you created. The vocal sounds loud only at first. After the first chorus it seems somewhat lower. Did you change the levels mid-song?
 
I like the doubles, but they could be tighter. Maybe add some extra delayed verb on the doubled part to blend it better? Just a thought...
 
Regards,
Dan
 
2013/08/08 15:22:07
Guitarhacker
Nice work.
 
Is that you singing?  I agree with the things mentioned above. The doubling is OK when used properly, and this is done too loudly. It should be barely audible to work right.  I normally keep my doubling at -24 db or there about... solo the vocal bus and you can hear it, but, in the mix, not so much, it just adds some fattening.
 
The vocal phrasing and flow are awkward in quite a few places. This indicates that, from a songwriting POV, it really needs to be re-written to flow better, and easier. You try to say too much in the given time.....so rewrite it to say it better in the allotted time and phrasing.....
 
The blatantly silly excuse ...I pretended it was you.....quite unbelievable..... I would look at that as part of the rewrite, assuming you plan to do so...... or leave it and move on.... I tend to move on quite often. But sometimes, the rewrites are well worth the time and effort. Of course, if you have "fallen in love" with this version, a rewrite is hard to do.
 
The style was classic 80's country.... Micky Gilly, urban cowboy time frame..... definitely not contemporary style for today's Nashville.
 
Aside from all that... nitpicking...... it sounded good.
2013/08/09 10:55:13
Eddie TX
Hey guys, thanks for the comments.  I've been tweaking the mix a bit ... at first, I thought I might leave the extra vox as they were, to give it a more "human" feel, but the more I listened, the more they kinda bugged me.  So I've tightened them up and tried to blend them in better.  Good suggestion!
 
As for the suggestion that I rewrite the song, including the title, um, how about I just leave this one as is and write another one!  Cheatin' songs are a whole sub-genre unto themselves.  Lots of different angles to explore (no pun intended).  And of course the song's title is a silly excuse -- sinners have always come up with pathetic excuses.  This one's no different.
Guitarhacker
The style was classic 80's country.... Micky Gilly, urban cowboy time frame..... definitely not contemporary style for today's Nashville.


That's exactly what I was going for, buddy ... thanks!
 
Cheers,
Eddie
 
 
 
 
 
2013/08/09 11:10:05
Guitarhacker
Eddie TX
 
As for the suggestion that I rewrite the song, including the title, um, how about I just leave this one as is and write another one!  Cheatin' songs are a whole sub-genre unto themselves.  Lots of different angles to explore (no pun intended).  And of course the song's title is a silly excuse -- sinners have always come up with pathetic excuses.  This one's no different.
Guitarhacker
The style was classic 80's country.... Micky Gilly, urban cowboy time frame..... definitely not contemporary style for today's Nashville.


That's exactly what I was going for, buddy ... thanks!
 
Cheers,
Eddie
 




Well, to rewrite the song for a better flow was simply a suggestion..... I have a number of tunes I have been prompted to rewrite by the powers that be, however, after having rewritten them several times already, I decided to "let them be" and simply move on as well..... guess it all depends on what the end goal for the song is.....
 
 
Classic 80's country... yep, you nailed it and BTW..... I love that era in country music.....
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