Bob this is great. Except there is just so much wrong.....
The tune is quantum Oysterlicious.
But, something is wrong with the groove in places where evrything falls out of sync or something.
That's the audio side.
video:
from the comments above about fear of the camera it shows.
I know you can do it right though.
Remember back when you first heard your voice recorded......... Oh, the dread. LOL...
Really. no different. Don't be shy.
Spike the hair and let er rip...
Here's an idea. (I don't know if it's feasable with your video software).
Instead of staying on the one shot so long, do a bunch of different takes of different parts and let them bounce in and out of the video. I mean like different clothes, guitar, look etc. More drums. More shattered glass (search the web).
Anyway, it's all good. Just wanna push you to the next level. Don't be shy.