Brave attempt, to my furry alien ears the lead violins are to back in the mix in the opening phase they need to be in your face, they are the hook. Pan them off once it starts but they are competing with the bass sustained notes on the right channel.
Perhaps a little bit to much reverb and bring up the vocals.
This of course could just my furry ears and there are others with much more experienced mix advise here.
Thanks for sharing, good effort.