I hate to break it to you, Maurice, but there is more to being Bapu than just unfunniness (unfunnyhood? unfun? unfunnality?). One does not simply play Am and become Bapu. Sure, some have developed the moobs, mastered the art of going all crash in the loudspeaker, and even ridden Mooch's seatless bike, but they're still not Bapu.
Bapu Am what he Am, and the rest of us Amn't (Am not?). On the positive side, however, I believe it is entirely possible that you could be Clarissa.
HTH