I go back and forth between Cameron's Woods & Waters Organic and Starbuck's Sumatra. Grind and brew it in the morning and I'm good for a few mugs.
No sugar, no cream. Black. Coffee that makes your insides jump up and say, "What was that?"
Oh. Yes.
Typical Starbucks Drive Through Beverage Procurement Process (Short Version):
Eustace Merriweather Flobisher III (Barista): Forsooth, m'lord! How may'est I serve thee on this glorious morn?
Me: Coffee.
Eustace Merriweather Flobisher III (Barista): Pray, noble squire, would'st thou care to indulge in a delicious Iced Upside Down Caramel Macchiato?
Me: No. Coffee.
Eustace Merriweather Flobisher III (Barista): Methinks thou doth protest too much! Nay! Would'st thou prefer a half-caff Non-Fat Frappuccino With Extra Whipped Cream And Chocolate Sauce?
Me: Is this mic on? I just want coffee.
Eustace Merriweather Flobisher III (Barista): Ho, thy jests are beyond mine understanding. Thou clearly art a connoisseur. May'est we tempt thee with a Decaf Soy Latte With An Extra Shot And Cream?
Me: No, Little Lord Fauntleroy, I just want a plain cup of coffee.
Eustace Merriweather Flobisher III (Barista): Sadly, sire, none such persons are known to us. But, if this poor knave has grasped thine intent, thou would'st expect us to believe that thou would'st be satisfied with a common cup of coffee? Can this be?
Me: It can and it is. If you can manage to get most of it inside the cup, you might have a future in this business.
Eustace Merriweather Flobisher III (Barista): Pray thee, lord, what is the measurement of the vessel thou may'est desire?
Me: Large.
Eustace Merriweather Flobisher III (Barista): A thousand pardons, m'lord! Methinks ye may be mocking me with thy wit and foreign tongue. Would'st thou prefer a Tall, Grande or Venti goblet?
Me: Which one means, "Bucket?"
Eustace Merriweather Flobisher III (Barista): So, you just want a big cup of coffee, then?
Me: Verily.
Eustace Merriweather Flobisher III (Barista): $4.50, pull up to the window.