This was on TV about 3:00 this morning during the 40th repeat of Sharknado...I've attempted to transcribe it as closely as memory will allow, but it WAS on at 3:00 AM...
What would you pay for a bundle of IKM's best-selling compressors (Black 76, Model 670, White 2A, etc).
DON'T ANSWER YET!What would you pay if we threw in a whole bunch of amp sims (American Vintage T, Modern Tube Lead, SVT Classic, etc.)?WOULD YOU PAY $100? $200? $2,500 OR MORE?
BUT WAIT! DON'T ANSWER YET!
For the first 10,000 callers we're throwing in a whole bunch of effects! TWO choruses, TWO phasers, THREE - you heard me right, folks - THREE flangers plus a boatload of reverbs and delays.
NOW HOW MUCH WOULD YOU PAY FOR THIS AMAZING PACKAGE? $200? $500? $700?
No, my friends, under this one-time offer you pay just NINETY-NINE DOLLARS!
Ninety-nine dollars for this incredible collection of your favorite effects. We know they're your favorites because you already own them!
BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!
Call now and we'll throw in a bunch of pianos and drums and strings and stuff.
THAT'S RIGHT, ALL FOR THE INCREDIBLE PRICE OF JUST NINETY-NINE DOLLARS!
(iRing motion sensor for iPhone sold separately)(Offer void in Barbados, Marguaritaville, regions subject to truth-in-advertising laws, and wherever that snarky yorolpal lives)