Overcoming addiction

I'd recommend taking lessons from a classical guitar teacher. Either that, or lookup some basic finger picking exercises on YouTube. I'm sure there are books available as well (Mel Bay, etc.).

Thanks guys for the feedback. The video is as amazing as it is depressing (like how far I got to go).

A better guitar player than me might not have to start over. Several aspects of my "style" draw on things that require the plastic with or without other finger involvement. So far I can't replicate the effects without a pick. Nothing is lost and the experience is somewhat liberating forcing me down different avenues.
 
John

Mandolin,
 
Think you understand the torture. Did every combination and permutation of the metal and plastic finger coverings trying to get the exquisite plastic resonance of an isolated pick. Nothing worked for me, fingers metal or plastic plated trying to feel the instrument. Nothing but the bare fingers if the pick was not there.. Everything else like in your experience made it worse.
 
Based my mediocre limitations as a guitar player on insane speed at the expense of meaningful content. Needed a hypersonic trill with a light gage pick to hit every note. Had mastered a funk technique of fingernail followed by a couple millisec delay before the pick hit for slower note definition (always got me the girls). Maybe best brain dead thing I got together connecting with the instrument is ringing the notes in a Byrds sorta way. Mini orchestra on a six string. Needs heavy compression for sustain, rewired circuit on a single coil design, and a pick.
 
Mush of the flesh simply does not deliver the glory.
Getting blisters on my thumb but this too shall pass. Trying to learn.
 
John
 

Just try playing the guitar while watching TV or just sitting in the kitchen, noodle around with the finger picking (not really trying to do something technically specific, but something comfortable). You'd be surprised at how you can accidentally run into a picking pattern without knowing it and it's not a "forced" lesson. Once you get comfortable with that, you can always take it a bit further in fine tuning the technique.
 
I did this so much in the kitchen while the Mrs. was cooking/the little ones hanging around singing, I got very comfortable using the thumb and first 3 fingers......of course, playing children's songs (....and the wheels on the bus go round and round).  

The key to success, even partial success, is to "just do it".  Start with fingerpicking the fundamentals, no matter what the sound that comes out.
 
There's an exercise I was doing with my bass and guitar.  Dead simple, pick up the first 4 frets on the lowest string, then up the first 4 on the next string and so on. Then move up one fret and pick your way down 4321 on the highest string, then down 4321 on the next, and so on.  Then move up a fret and go up 1234 and repeat the same damned thing again and again until you get to the farthest playable fret.
 
Then, work your way down the fretboard.
 
With my bass, I'd do it one time through with a pick.  Then going down, with thumb slaps.  Then going up with right hand picking 121212, then 123 123 123...or 123 321 123 321.
 
Mind you, I'm not "playing" anything.  A bastardized chromatic exercise doesn't even qualify as an arpeggio.  I'm just going up and down all frets with all fingers and with various left hand fingerings and various right-hand picking/fingerpicking sequences, and doing it to a click.
 
It's kind of like playing all the stick techniques for drummers.  On a practice pad, with a click. LRLRLRLR, then RLRLRLRL, then LRLLRLRR, then RLRRLRLL, and so on.
 
I'm not an expert, of course.  I'll be posting here one day because I can't make simple chords without having my fat fingers accidentally muting strings and making dead sounds. 
 
God, I hate the emoticons on this forum.  They're so LAME and most are not even understandable.  I'd buy a coffee cup and t-shirt if we could just adopt STANDARD forum emoticons.  Please?

My psychiatrist (when I was young that is) took lessons from my classical guitar teacher during the same period as I.  I wonder how good he got?  Take classical guitar lessons.  It's a very rich repertoire; a new vein of gold to mine.

Hi, John.
 
I am a picker (lol) but it's really only because most of the material I play requires it (hi gain thrashy stuff to rhythm acoustic that needs to keep a "brush" beat). However I learned "hybrid" picking (pick between forefinger and thumb + using the middle and ring finger to pluck higher notes) early on and when I need the extra versatility that's generally what I fall back on (I actually used that for the intro of that last BBZ song we did). As cheesy and cliched as it is to say this I picked (nopunlol) up that style from learning Stairway to Heaven about  six months into the only official lessons I ever took (I only got one year before dear ole dad cheaped out on the lessons). I actually wanted to go full on with classical training but it was not in the cards.
 
THAT said there are a LOT of different approaches to fingerpicking but to start with here are some fundamentals of "proper" that are tried and true and should get anyone where they need to go if they practice enough...
 
Learn the PIMA system and seek out materials that utilize it to teach proper form...
 
https://www.guitarlessonworld.com/lessons/fingerpicking-technique/
 
hrrm... a brief skim of that and it looks like it covers some other useful stuff too but whatever...
 
The other thing is learning "Apoyando" vs. "Tirando". Here's a weird descriptive article about it...
 
https://onlineguitaracademy.net/articles/flamenco-guitar-technique/apoyando-and-tirando-two-main-strokes.html
 
BUT my general understanding of it it all is (since I studied this yeeears ago so I may be wrong/oversimplifying)
 
Apoyando = Your fingers pointing straight down toward the face of the instrument (like a tradition bass player would) so you can do scale runs and little "flourishes". Usually it's a back/forth (index and middle finger or I and P in the PIMA system) which is tricky but you can replace "plastic" picked parts by flicking your middle finger (or index) back and forth on a single string as you fret the notes/run (which requires some careful left hand string muting and precision attack on the string being fretted to play cleanly). That latter style/variant is the type of thing you see/hear Flamenco guys/gals doing whereas in classical guit it's more of that "walking" I + M bass style attack for runs.
 
That Flamenco style flickering of the M and/or I is also great for hammering down on chords. In that case you want to slam the top of the figernail down to focus on the note most important to the chord you are playing or what will best represent the chor. For example you may want to strike the bass note first then let the nail chomp down into one or more strings underneath it or you may want the whole chord to sound evenly so you'd focus on the "middle" string(s) of the chord whilst still raking across the strings above or below the "middle" (so if it's a simple three string triad would focus your attack on the middle string or for a six string chord you would focus your attack on the middle two strings and so on... lots of judgement calls that need to be made on the fly in all this).
 
Tirando = What I refer to as "Crab Hand". The picking hand is flat against the instrument and the fingers are bent (and ready too pluck). You only pluck one string at a time generally using your thumb to hit "bass" notes and adding melody/ornamentation/chord qualities with your I M A fingers. This is of course the style that takes supreme advantage of the tonal versatility of the guitar but also lacks the attack of other styles. It's the style that makes translating classical compositions to a single guitar possible (the 6 string guit isn't nearly as old as a lot of the classical music played on it). This style (versus Apoyando) also allows for quick right hand palm muting (please note if you are a lefty just reverse my right hand/left hand silliness).
 
Learning these two styles to a minimal degree of efficiency/accuracy by practicing scales, arpeggios and I to the V (or III) bass note progressions with upper register chord notes played over top said progression will get you a general idea of what can and needs to be done to master those styles.
 
At the end of the day though, just like all musical theories and methods, it is up to the musician to "lock" into what is actually going on and why it sounds good (and why sometimes it doesn't sound good). This crap can be WAAAAAY overthought.
 
Personally lately I've pulled out my acoustic again (after ensuring my neighbors are cool with it) and have been experimenting quite a bit... as I always did. However I recently did a massive stint boning up on my bass skills sans a pick (even the what I'm working on is using a pick it was still extremely useful to figure out how I wanted the bass to pop with the drums). Anyway one of the bassists I was trying to wrap my head around was John Entwhistle. I know a crapton of Who stuff as it is and had the privilege to play extensively with a master of his style... plus Entwhistle kicked arse. My point is, and YMMV, my time mucking about with some of those old Entwhistle finger picking tricks has seemed to have translated VERY nicely to my acoustic mayhem. Look up some old vids and watch his picking hand. He does crazy runs and WAILS on chords just twiddling his middle finger. Doing that on bass for a while and just goofing around with other stuff really strengthened my right hand so when I started riffing on a guit with those techniques in mind it just seemed natural.
 
THAT THAT THAT said... again I will remind anyone and everyone that you need to do what works for you and your musical ambitions. I reject the notion that pick style is inferior or superior to fingerpicking. I also reject that one needs to become an automaton in specific theories or techniques to be a valid player. Quite the opposite actually especially when it comes to guitar. The guitar is one of the most tonally versatile and personal instruments ever invented. Learing technique and theory is great and can open a lot of doors creatively but I personally would never limit myself to any one style or technique.
 
Then again I also consider a lot of what I do "stunt" guitar playing. There is sooooooo much more that can be squeezed out of our axe boxes than has already been done. I know mine ain't done giving up secrets and I've been playing for almost 30 years.
 
Cheers and happy riffin'.

Guys,
 
Advice is spot on. Still going thru Beep's post and links.
Playing without any hard core focus and expectation has to be at the core of it. Can't get a good sound, judging quality in the infancy attempts is enough to turn anyone off. Give it up and revert to the pick again.
 
Making a lot of low quality noise. The wife is wondering what happened to my playing. Should not be going downhill this fast. Told her it is a transition that might sound better sometime.
 
John

Thanks Bass. Under my radar presently, but see the need to sculpt the fingernails to get a treble attack. Ability to grab several notes at once a big benefit you can't do with a pick. Also fully empathize with the problem of flying picks either on stage or in the studio. We all been there. The vid Jarsve posted had a comment about the fingernail versus the skin strike spoken from a genius who been there, done that.
 
John

Damn, think I'm starting to get the hang of this...

It helps me to think of it as a pluck. They don't pick harps. 
Pickin' Pluckin" I guess it don't matter unless it matter to you.

Starise
It helps me to think of it as a pluck. They don't pick harps. 
Pickin' Pluckin" I guess it don't matter unless it matter to you.

Hi Starise. Tirando is absolutely very similar to harp playing. You just gotta a be a little more careful so as not to snap the strings against the fretboard (unless that is your goal).

Ya, man. You've gotten lots of great advice here and there is just reams of tuts on the internet/in print about this type of thing but it is an extremely broad and subjective/style specific topic.
 
This is where you need to sort through it all and figure out what works for you and your goals.
 
I've always taken you as folksy campfire plucking building up to maybe Knopfler and/or heaby bluegrass type stuff.
 
That crazy "Djent" aand hyper technical finger stuff is impressive but just like 8 finger tapping was back in the day for me... is it really worth it for what I am trying to acheive?
 
For me the answer was... nope.
 
Again, explore and develop any technique that facilitates your style. You will never run out of exercises/styles to goof around with so it is good too focus on the ones that work for you... now (especially if you are older). You can add in other things later on top of the fundamentals if you so desire which are generally based on those fundamentals anyway (they are fundamentals for a reason).
 
Cheers.

Beepster
 
That crazy "Djent" aand hyper technical finger stuff is impressive but just like 8 finger tapping was back in the day for me... is it really worth it for what I am trying to acheive?
 
For me the answer was... nope.

 
I identify with this sentiment so much.  I absolutely love the djent style, although there's some irritating baggage that comes with it, and it's so impressive visually and audibly.  The level these players are at, and the discipline it takes to get there is admirable.  
 
But I'm 47 and I'm not throwing away 30 years of my style to start all over again...I'm officially old and boring now.  
 
It's not worth what I'm trying to achieve to learn all of that stuff, but it is interesting to mess with, and like all musical styles I'm just going to rob the parts of the genre I like - that I can actually DO - and fold it into what I do and move forward...