From the very far side of the twisted mind of telejazz
Last night was New Years Eve and Three of the top rated DAW's in the music world were looking to party and have a real good time..
Since I gave up drinking and drugging years ago they had asked me to be the designated driver for their evening out.
I knew they were looking for some good clean fun so our first stop was the fun house of a Carnival ...
As we all stood there in the room full of mirrors we all decided to play a little game of mirror mirror on the wall ...
After drawing USB sticks to determine who would go first they each took a turn at the mirror ...
Abelton Live 9 stepped up to the mirror first and said "mirror mirror on the wall who's the coolest DAW of them all "
Now I was standing there and I have to say I started getting a little scared when the room got so quiet I could hear my heart beating loudly in my chest .
Then all of a sudden Kaboom ...the mirror lit up and in one big flash of light the mirror exploded into a thousand pieces of reflective glass just like a diamond .
The next thing I know is we are all in a room with a few thousand people dancing .
The girls are looking so hot and sexy under the flashing lights as they danced to The EDM music coming out of the sub-woofers . I was like WHOA what rock have I been hiding under all these years ..

Then I see Abelton walk over to the DJ and they start doing some high fives .
The next thing I know the DJ hands Abelton the headphones and steps aside from his rig and turns the reins of his sound rig over to Abelton ...
The beat started getting real tribal ...mixed in with a little bit of jungle vibe w a touch of poly rhythmic action going on.
Things went on like that for about a set . I didn't want to leave because I was having way to much fun ..
Next thing we all know were back in the room full of mirrors ....
After giving our self's a few moments to regain our composure we eagerly awaited for Pro Tools turn at the mirror
Pro Tools walks up to the mirror , clasps his hands , cracks his knuckles and says
"mirror mirror on the wall who's the most professional DAW of them all "
Now at this point I have to admit that I wasn't half as scared as I was before only because I had some idea that something was gonna happen ..What it was i did not know , but I was ready for it or so i thought .
It was then the ground began to shake as the room grew dark . The edges of the mirror became golden filled with jewels and precious stones much like a picture would be framed in an art museum if the museum was only displaying rare priceless riches .
A great winged Lion greeted us as we walked through the mirror and just like a magic carpet we rode on his back through the sky to a purple waterfall where he bid us goodbye and told us to ascend . As we made our way ascending up the great purple waterfall I was struck by the fact that the water was not water at all .
The waterfall was composed of great beams of purifying purple light and the sensation of rising felt more like a form of levitation.
Once we got to the top a great marble room with large pillars was revealed to us ..
I could hear the gentle strains of music permeating through out the great hall .
It was then it happened . The room became filled with the sound of music ever so sublime .
As the music played great recording studios of all pedigree started to materialize in their full glory in this great marble hall ..
I was struck by the beauty of it all .
As each studio appeared the room was filled with the familiar sounds of music I had hear before ...
The stark realization started to hit me that there were no engineers or studio workers in any of the studios that were magnificently passing before my eyes and ears ...
Then a great laughter shook the hall ...
I looked around to determine the source of this laughter and to my surprise I had caught out of the corner on my eye Pro Tools smiling at me with a mischievous benevolent smile on his face ...
I asked Pro Tools "where is everybody "? "all the engineers and studio staff ?"
Pro Tools smiled at me and said " everybody is here , they are just taking a well deserved break " " would you like to meet them "?
I said "sure I would love to meet some of these super talented people ...I could sure learn a lot from them "
Pro Tools said " sure lets go I'll introduce you "
After walking down a large hallway for what seemed like a mile and a half I started to hear the muffled sound of people having fun on the other side of the large doorway I was standing in front of....
Pro Tools placed a hand on my shoulder and asked me " are you ready for this "? I said " yeah I'm ready "
The large darkly stained Oak door swung wide open and to tell you the truth I was actually a little bit surprised at what I saw ..
I saw what looked like to me a large banquet room just like something you would see in a royal castle or something like that but instead of tables for eating and dining it looked like the room was set up for parlor games ..
One things for sure it looked and sounded like everybody in there was having a lot of fun ...
As my eyes adjusted to the lighting of the room I did a double take and turned to Pro Tools and asked " are they doing what I think they are doing " ? Pro Tools looked at me and gave me a non verbal nod of his head ..
It didn't matter that I had tried to speak in a calm voice ...I did try as hard as I could to ...honestly I did ..
I remember blurting out in what must have sounded like an adolescent virgins teens voice who was attending his first pajama party where someone gave him his first look at a girly mags pin up centerfold ....
OMG. I shouted as my voice broke and my throat cackled ...
WOOOSH the room fell silent and everybody looked at me for a sec ..after what seemed an eternity to me everybody just went back to what they were doing ...
I looked at Pro Tools and said " Hey they are all playing cards " Pro Tools looked at me and said " Yeah I know "
I said " Yeah , but they ain't using money or chips ...they are using piles of Platinum and Gold Records instead ."
Pro Tools smiled , looked me dead in the eye and said " Yep , money isn't everything Kenny , look at the bright side when you start making and getting some of those type of chips , you can pretty much write your own check "
I said " Amen "
WHOA what happened ? I'm back in the room full of mirrors again ...
Up next is SONAR ....just as SONAR was making it's way to the mirror the mirror says "stop wait for a second" ..
Then the mirror looks at me and asks " say aren't you the designated driver for this crew " ?
I say " yes I am , but i didn't draw a USB stick to get a turn " Then the mirror said " don't worry about it "
"Are you a member of the SONAR Forum " I say " Yes I am "
The mirror asks " Are you in good standing over there "?
I say " it depends on who you ask ..I think I'm on thin ice most of the time "
The mirror says "Good " I say " Really " ?
The mirror says " Yeah kid that means there's room for growth "
"now look into my eyes and tell me what you see"
I say to the mirror " you don't want me to do the mirror mirror thing "? the mirror again says "NO "
" look into my eyes and tell me what you see"
OK mirror " I see a buterfly standing on a leaf proudly talking with a cocoon "
good Kenny " what do you think that means ? "
" hhhhmm , a butterfly didn't start out as a butterfly right ? a butterfly started out as a Caterpillar , then it went into a cocoon and eventually it became a butterfly "
" Very Good Telejazz there is hope for you yet "
" Hey mirror , so what do you want me to do here " ?
" I want you to go back to the forum and tell them the story of the butterfly and I want you to tell it just like this "
There once was a butterfly who was overheard telling a cocoon "Yes you too can fly someday once you drop the cocoon " You got that K....
" yeah I got it ..man there gonna kill me over there for saying all this stuff and posting it "
Hey K don't worry about it ...you ain't exactly flying yet either your self ..you still got the protection of the cocoon ..
" Yeah that's true " "do you think they might get where your going with this "?
" some will some won't ...if they don't like it they can always pick up the story where you left off

right " ?
Yeah that might work
OK then .....
Happy New Years '
Kenny